Here's a quick update from our trip to Duke:
Gwyneth is doing very well, and her doctors continue to be very happy with her progress. She has hit several milestones in just the past few weeks, including crawling, sitting up (from her hands and knees), pulling herself to a stand from a sitting position, waving and mimicking babbling (see video below). She is finally off a vitamin supplament that we have been giving her since we brought her home, and we are going to be trying a new formula with more calories to help her continue to gain weight. She weighs over 17 lbs now.
Tricia also received great reports. She feels better now than she has in several years, and since her bought with pneumonia a few months ago, she has not had any major lung issues. All of here tests and scans came back looking good and clean, and her doctors are very pleased with where she is at right now.
I also had an appointment with an ENT to discuss my recent sleep study. The sleep study shows that I have severe sleep apnea...on a scale of 1 to 100, any score of 40 and above is considered "severe"...my score was 92. My suspicion for the past few years is that my tonsils are abnormally huge (which the doctors confirm), and my goal has been to have them removed. After seeing my sleep study report, and learning that I've had three different cases of illness related to or caused by my tonsils in the past few months, the doctor agrees that a tonsilectomy is the best option. I've done my homework and know the nature of the surgery and recovery and am very satisfied to finally have a surgery scheduled. Ultimately, my decision comes down to the fact that my apnea and increased illnesses are both unhealthy for Gwyneth and (more so) Tricia.
All in all, it was a great trip, although Gwyneth is just now getting back to her normal sleep schedule, which always gets messed up when we go to Durham overnight.
Here's a cute video (cell phone) showing some of Gwyneth's progress...
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Friday, July 3, 2009
4th of July

Here's a little OBX secret...the absolute best place to watch fireworks is on top of Jockey's Ridge...not only do you not have to fight the traffic and the crowds that invade the beaches that night, you can easily see not one, not two, but three different fireworks displays from the biggest sand dunes on the East Coast! Here's another secret...the best place to park and walk up the dunes is at Nags Head Church.
Along with free parking, there will also be free Boar’s Head hotdogs (seriously some of the best dogs ever), free Seafreeze Slushies (nothing better than something ice cold in the middle of summer) and some awesome free activities for kids (can you say two moon bounces?). Did I mention that everything is free?!?
If you're wondering where I'll be tomorrow evening, you can find me in the parking lot of Nags Head Church.
Hope to see you there!
Nate
Parking is limited, so don't be late!
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
7AM
Leaving at 7am this morning for a two day trip to Duke...lots of appointments, even one for me. Praying for a safe trip, good reports and even a little time with some great friends.
Nate
Nate
Monday, June 29, 2009
Anniversary Date
What's that? You still haven't heard about our anniversary date? Maybe that 'cause you don't follow pattysue...
Seriously...I'll fill you in later on the details...in the meantime, here are a few pics I took with my cell phone...didn't need to take my real camera...still don't know why? :)




Nate
Seriously...I'll fill you in later on the details...in the meantime, here are a few pics I took with my cell phone...didn't need to take my real camera...still don't know why? :)




Nate
Saturday, June 27, 2009
The Gift Of A Future
I would be lying if I told you that, even on our wedding day, I was not cautiously optimistic that Tricia and I would be celebrating five years of marriage...certainly there were more than a few times when it seemed an impossibility. CF has certainly done it's best to take my wife away from us.
I truly believe that, without the grace of God and the work of the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation and the generosity of those who have given to fund their research, Tricia would not be alive today. Although CF is no longer our greatest concern, we still live and cope daily with the effects this disease has had and continues to have in our lives. And, we will always desire to remain an encouragement to other families who are also living with CF.
Even if it's just a buck or two, if you'd like to help make my anniversary the best ever, please consider donating to My Great Strides Fund and help make my family's future a little brighter today! Every penny goes directly to the CFF and their goal of making CF a thing of the past for thousands of people!
Thanks!
Nate
I truly believe that, without the grace of God and the work of the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation and the generosity of those who have given to fund their research, Tricia would not be alive today. Although CF is no longer our greatest concern, we still live and cope daily with the effects this disease has had and continues to have in our lives. And, we will always desire to remain an encouragement to other families who are also living with CF.
Even if it's just a buck or two, if you'd like to help make my anniversary the best ever, please consider donating to My Great Strides Fund and help make my family's future a little brighter today! Every penny goes directly to the CFF and their goal of making CF a thing of the past for thousands of people!
Thanks!
Nate
Happy Anniversary, Tricia!
5 years ago, we took the big jump, and I don't think we've hit solid ground yet...what an adventure these five years have been. I have no doubt we've experienced more in five years than many couples experience in a lifetime, and I wouldn't trade a single minute.
Whether at home, with friends and family, or by your hospital bed, I've been able to spend more time with you than most husbands get to spend with their wives in 50 years...every moment has been incredibly special in it's own unique way because of you.
Despite the rough ride, your beauty, grace and joy for life has only only increased. You are an amazing woman who loves God and people unconditionally. You have given hope and laughter to so many, but nobody has been blessed to know you more than I.
I'm praying today that God gives us many more years of great adventures together!
PS. I Love You!
Whether at home, with friends and family, or by your hospital bed, I've been able to spend more time with you than most husbands get to spend with their wives in 50 years...every moment has been incredibly special in it's own unique way because of you.
Despite the rough ride, your beauty, grace and joy for life has only only increased. You are an amazing woman who loves God and people unconditionally. You have given hope and laughter to so many, but nobody has been blessed to know you more than I.
I'm praying today that God gives us many more years of great adventures together!
PS. I Love You!
Friday, June 26, 2009
Our Wedding
5 years ago, tomorrow...I thought I'd repost these videos today...look for a new video tomorrow morning!

("Yellow" by Coldplay)

("Breathe In Breathe Out" by Mat Kerney)
BTW, if you were there that day, celebrating with us, I'd love for you to leave a comment and share with us your memories of our wedding.
Nate
Thanks, again, to Mary Basnight for the incredible photographic memories of that day!
("Yellow" by Coldplay)
("Breathe In Breathe Out" by Mat Kerney)
BTW, if you were there that day, celebrating with us, I'd love for you to leave a comment and share with us your memories of our wedding.
Nate
Thanks, again, to Mary Basnight for the incredible photographic memories of that day!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
MIA
I may be MIA the next few days...I'm busy wrapping up some things in preparation for our wedding anniversary celebration on Saturday. Can you guess what I have planned? Yes, dinner at some nice place is probably in the works, but not even Tricia can figure out the surprise stuff, so good luck!
Look for asappy sentimental post on Saturday morning, and another post later this weekend with all of the details and some pics.
Nate
PS. 44 points to anyone who recognized that was the first time I've crossed out a word like I just did on my blog.
Look for a
Nate
PS. 44 points to anyone who recognized that was the first time I've crossed out a word like I just did on my blog.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
The Shore - Cape May
I only took a few hundred pics this past week while on my mini-vacation, so I figured it would be best to split this up into a few posts...

We decided to take the scenic (long) route on the way home and drive down the Jersey/Delaware/Maryland coast line. I was especially looking forward to stopping in Cape May, NJ for a few hours, because I've heard nothing but great things about it. We spent a few hours there, walking the beaches and neighborhoods, checking out the shops in downtown and grabbing some lunch...


This is the beach in front of the really old, huge houses you'll see below...I'm guessing these are private lockers for the homeowners in this neighborhood...






Some very huge, very old homes (I think these two have been turned into bed and breakfast places)...



Although it was short, we had a great time, especially with our family. I'm still detoxing from all of the awesome (unhealthy) food we ate. BTW, we also saw the movie UP while we were there...we both really loved it, and Tricia cried at least a few times...
Nate

We decided to take the scenic (long) route on the way home and drive down the Jersey/Delaware/Maryland coast line. I was especially looking forward to stopping in Cape May, NJ for a few hours, because I've heard nothing but great things about it. We spent a few hours there, walking the beaches and neighborhoods, checking out the shops in downtown and grabbing some lunch...


This is the beach in front of the really old, huge houses you'll see below...I'm guessing these are private lockers for the homeowners in this neighborhood...






Some very huge, very old homes (I think these two have been turned into bed and breakfast places)...


From Cape May we took the ferry to DE...this is the only pic I managed...the wind was blowing hard and the boat was rocking, and my stomach was not enjoying it...

Although it was short, we had a great time, especially with our family. I'm still detoxing from all of the awesome (unhealthy) food we ate. BTW, we also saw the movie UP while we were there...we both really loved it, and Tricia cried at least a few times...
Nate
Monday, June 22, 2009
New Pics
If you haven't seen them yet, be sure to check out my photography blog for some great new pics of the three of us in our father's day Sunday best on my Photo Blog.
Nate
Nate
New Look
The Shore - Wonderland
I only took a few hundred pics this past week while on my mini-vacation, so I figured it would be best to split this up into a few posts...
Anything you see in "quotations" is a Yankee/Jersey word/phrase that this southern boy normally wouldn't use.
Gillian's Wonderland Pier is one of Tricia's favorite places on the boardwalk...it's the very first thing on the north end, near our beach house. It reminded me of the old Dowdy's Amusement Park that used to be here on the OBX. Lot's of old-school amusement games and rides...we went once with Gwyneth during the day...









And once at night by ourselves...












Nate
Anything you see in "quotations" is a Yankee/Jersey word/phrase that this southern boy normally wouldn't use.
Gillian's Wonderland Pier is one of Tricia's favorite places on the boardwalk...it's the very first thing on the north end, near our beach house. It reminded me of the old Dowdy's Amusement Park that used to be here on the OBX. Lot's of old-school amusement games and rides...we went once with Gwyneth during the day...









And once at night by ourselves...





There she is...







Nate
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Happy Father's Day
Happy day to all of the fathers out there! I'm having a great day so far...nothing beats a day of worshipping God with a bunch of friends, eating lunch with a bunch of family, and taking a nap with the two prettiest ladies in the world.
My father shared the following piece of the Bible in church this morning, and I thought I'd pass it along to you as an encouragement to all of the dads out there.
My children, listen to me.
Listen to your father's instruction.
Pay attention and grow wise,
for I am giving you good guidance.
Don't turn away from my teaching.
For I too was once my father's son,
tenderly loved by my mother...
My father told me,
"Take my words to heart.
Follow my instructions and you will live."
(Proverbs 4:1-4)
I'm thankful for my father, who gave me both good instruction and a good model. I pray I am already doing the same for Gwyneth.
And, as I did last year, I'm posting a video of the experience that made me really feel like a father for the first time...
My father shared the following piece of the Bible in church this morning, and I thought I'd pass it along to you as an encouragement to all of the dads out there.
My children, listen to me.
Listen to your father's instruction.
Pay attention and grow wise,
for I am giving you good guidance.
Don't turn away from my teaching.
For I too was once my father's son,
tenderly loved by my mother...
My father told me,
"Take my words to heart.
Follow my instructions and you will live."
(Proverbs 4:1-4)
I'm thankful for my father, who gave me both good instruction and a good model. I pray I am already doing the same for Gwyneth.
And, as I did last year, I'm posting a video of the experience that made me really feel like a father for the first time...
The Shore - The Boardwalk
I only took a few hundred pics this past week while on my mini-vacation, so I figured it would be best to split this up into a few posts...
Anything you see in "quotations" is a Yankee/Jersey word/phrase that this southern boy normally wouldn't use.
Having been to Wildwood, NJ a few years ago, I did not have high expectations for the Ocean City Boardwalk... But, the fact that OC is a "dry" city (no alcohol is sold in the city limits), and the fact that the city actually seems to care about keeping itself family friendly, it was much cleaner and less chaotic than I expected. If you've never been to a "boardwalk" before, I'll show you a pic or two of it in my next post...every boardwalk I've been to is different, but I liked this one the best. It's not something that I'd want to vacation to all the time, but I can see why Tricia has such fond memories from her childhood...it's basically like going to a big state fair on the beach...lot's of food, lots of arcades and amusement rides, lots of people.














Nate
Anything you see in "quotations" is a Yankee/Jersey word/phrase that this southern boy normally wouldn't use.
Having been to Wildwood, NJ a few years ago, I did not have high expectations for the Ocean City Boardwalk... But, the fact that OC is a "dry" city (no alcohol is sold in the city limits), and the fact that the city actually seems to care about keeping itself family friendly, it was much cleaner and less chaotic than I expected. If you've never been to a "boardwalk" before, I'll show you a pic or two of it in my next post...every boardwalk I've been to is different, but I liked this one the best. It's not something that I'd want to vacation to all the time, but I can see why Tricia has such fond memories from her childhood...it's basically like going to a big state fair on the beach...lot's of food, lots of arcades and amusement rides, lots of people.

Some world-camous Kohr Custard, with "jimmies" (sprinkles)...








Hermit crabs...we've got them on the OBX as well, but the colors make for a great pic...


Neither one of us loves arcades, but we decided to blow 5$ anyway...

By far, the tallest funnel cake I've ever seen...Tricia likes "extra sugar", and she did give me a bite or two before she finished it up.


Nate
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Ready for Combat!
Gwyneth hit a HUGE milestone this past week...she started combat crawling (on her elbows)! She's seriously been on the verge of doing this forever, so it's very exciting (as I'm sure it is for any parent) for us to see it...we're hoping she'll be crawling on her hands and knees very soon. Here's some video proof!
The Shore - The Cape May Zoo
I only took a few hundred pics this past week while on my mini-vacation, so I figured it would be best to split this up into a few posts...
Anything you see in "quotations" is a Yankee/Jersey word/phrase that this southern boy normally wouldn't use.
Tricia and Gwyneth arrived in Jersey on Thursday, and drove with most of her family to "the shore", Ocean City on Friday...all of her brothers and sisters, with families in tow, spent, at least, part of the weekend hanging out and having fun. Tricia's parents rented a beach house in northern OC, a few blocks from the ocean, literally at the very north end of the boardwalk. I arrived late Sunday night.


I was told that the weekend was nice and warm, but from Monday morning through Wednesday when we left to come home, the temps were in the 70's, the sky was overcast and there was a strong wind blowing off the water...which, of course, makes for some unfavorable beach conditions. I only spent about an hour total in the sand on the beach, most of that time fully clothed because it was so chilly. But, that's fine with me because I can go to the beach anytime I want anyway. Here's the one picture of me and Gwyneth on the beach, enjoying some fishes (they're so delicious!)...Tricia stayed wrapped in a sweatshirt and towel.

But, when we weren't directly on the sand by the ocean, the weather was perfect for everything else we did! Tricia grew up vacationing at Ocean City and other places along the shore in southern NJ, so she had 101 things for us to do. Monday afternoon, the three of us headed down the coast about 20 miles to the Cape May County Zoo!
This was probably the best zoo I've ever been to, which is saying something since I've been to some pretty sweet zoos. Here's a few reasons why (all you other zoos pay attention):
1) It's free...yes, free (although we did give a donation), which, based on my experience of the NJ shore, is pretty remarkable (considering you've got to pay just to physically be on the sand/beach...).
2) It was probably about 90% shaded...nearly everywhere you walk, you're under the shade of lots of trees (in comparison, our local Norfolk Zoo is basically a giant concrete oven).
3) It's not too big and not too small...it took us about 2 hours to walk through the entire thing and look at every animal.











A couple of other highlights from the zoo include a newborn lemur, a local snake just hanging out near the alligator exhibit, and a very loud and lightning fast cheetah fight.
Nate
Anything you see in "quotations" is a Yankee/Jersey word/phrase that this southern boy normally wouldn't use.
Tricia and Gwyneth arrived in Jersey on Thursday, and drove with most of her family to "the shore", Ocean City on Friday...all of her brothers and sisters, with families in tow, spent, at least, part of the weekend hanging out and having fun. Tricia's parents rented a beach house in northern OC, a few blocks from the ocean, literally at the very north end of the boardwalk. I arrived late Sunday night.


I was told that the weekend was nice and warm, but from Monday morning through Wednesday when we left to come home, the temps were in the 70's, the sky was overcast and there was a strong wind blowing off the water...which, of course, makes for some unfavorable beach conditions. I only spent about an hour total in the sand on the beach, most of that time fully clothed because it was so chilly. But, that's fine with me because I can go to the beach anytime I want anyway. Here's the one picture of me and Gwyneth on the beach, enjoying some fishes (they're so delicious!)...Tricia stayed wrapped in a sweatshirt and towel.

But, when we weren't directly on the sand by the ocean, the weather was perfect for everything else we did! Tricia grew up vacationing at Ocean City and other places along the shore in southern NJ, so she had 101 things for us to do. Monday afternoon, the three of us headed down the coast about 20 miles to the Cape May County Zoo!
This was probably the best zoo I've ever been to, which is saying something since I've been to some pretty sweet zoos. Here's a few reasons why (all you other zoos pay attention):
1) It's free...yes, free (although we did give a donation), which, based on my experience of the NJ shore, is pretty remarkable (considering you've got to pay just to physically be on the sand/beach...).
2) It was probably about 90% shaded...nearly everywhere you walk, you're under the shade of lots of trees (in comparison, our local Norfolk Zoo is basically a giant concrete oven).
3) It's not too big and not too small...it took us about 2 hours to walk through the entire thing and look at every animal.











A couple of other highlights from the zoo include a newborn lemur, a local snake just hanging out near the alligator exhibit, and a very loud and lightning fast cheetah fight.
Nate
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Home From The Shore
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Off To Ocean City
I'm heading to Ocean City, NJ this afternoon for a mini-vacation with Tricia's family...I plan on not being anywhere near my computer until Wednesday evening/Thursday morning. I'll take lots of fun pics, and I'm sure will have some interesting stories to tell.
Nate
Nate
Friday, June 12, 2009
Gone Baby Gone
Tricia and Gwyneth drove up to NJ yesterday to hang with family...I'm heading that way on Sunday, and we're all going to be taking a mini vacation to the "Jersey Shore" with her family for a few days. Ocean City, if you must know. I'm not crazy about the beaches in NJ, but I'm committed to having a good time because I know how much Tricia loves it, and she's especially excited to take Gwyneth for the first time. And, I'm pretty sure I'll get some great photos that I couldn't get on the beaches down here in NC.
But, until then, I'm missing my girls a whole lot...at least, I have some sweet pics to look at...



Nate
But, until then, I'm missing my girls a whole lot...at least, I have some sweet pics to look at...



Nate
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Scammers and Fake Blogs
I've thought several times about writing this post, but with the recent discovery that another, widely popular blog is indeed a scam, I've finally made the decision that this is as good a time as any to share what little bit of experience I might have to add to the conversation.
Having been personally duped by a fake blog about a year ago, and having observed (but thankfully not invested any energy, links, etc. into) the blog referred to above, I feel somewhat experienced in the art of spotting some potential red flags that might signal a scammer or a fake blog.
Here are a few fake blog red flags that I've identified:
> The blog author posts few to no pictures of him/herself and his/her life (like his/her family and friends, house, town/city, etc.). Both of the fake blogs I have experience never showed a single photo (face) of the author of the blog, and showed very few, if any, pictures of his/her life. There are some bloggers who like to protect their privacy, but by it's very nature, blogs are an incredibly public form of communication, and most people who get into blogging (for honest reasons) are very open about their lives...those bloggers who desire privacy usually set their blogs to "private" so that they are only viewable by a select few people. A blogger (especially one that has thousands of followers) who never posts a a picture of him/herself has always seemed a bit of an odd thing to me.
> The author uses an alias and/or refuses to post his/her real name or other personal info like hometown, names of hospitals, etc. Both of the fake blogs I have experience with had authors who either refused to post their real name, or often used an alias when posting. It's one thing to use nicknames for your wife or your kids or your friends, but it's another thing to not want people to know your real, full name. Again, blogging tends to attract people who don't mind some of their basic personal info being displayed to the world.
Personally speaking, we have been very open about our story, using pictures and much of our personal information. Our story has also been well documented in news papers and on television, and we have met countless blog readers in person who would be more than happy to vouch for our existence. Although we do atempt to protect our privacy to some degree, we have always welcomed a certain level of publicity for several reasons, not the least of which being to give ourselves some credibility should anyone (and some have tried) attack our integrity.
> There are multiple anonymous people authoring (posting) the blog. Both of the fake blogs I have experience with had multiple authors/posters. And, as it turned out, each of the scammers had also, to some extent, scammed the other author(s) of their own blog into believing their story and posting for them. Obviously the scammer realizes he/she is creating a web of lies, and it appears to me that, to use multiple authors gives the scammer a false sense of security and authenticity.
> The blog asks for money/donations of some kind that directly benefit the blogger. Without a doubt, money is one of the biggest reasons these fake bloggers get into it. Both of the scammers that I have experienced asked for personal donations or gifts.
On a personal note, before my blog became so popular, I had a link on my sidebar that asked for people to consider donating to Tricia's health care trust fund. Shortly after the blog exploded, however, I decided that it would be best for us not to use this blog to ask for personal financial support because 1) I determined that was not the purpose of this blog, 2) I knew it would turn some people off from reading our story, and 3) I didn't want our asking for personal financial support to come back and bite us in the butt. In fact, a year ago, when a popular CF related blog that I had linked to was found to be fake, several people (read trolls) began, very publicly, pointing fingers at me, accusing me of scamming people because I was also constantly asking for personal financial support...fortunately, several of my level headed blog readers also pointed out that had not been asking for any personal financial support for several months, and wisdom and truth prevailed.
> Something doesn't feel right. Bottom line, trust your instincts. If something feels off or if things just don't seem to add up, nobody is pressuring you to support or even read any blog. Again, we're each responsible for our own decisions, and even if thousands of others are hooked, you don't have to be.
I personally had some doubts about the legitimacy of the fake blog that I linked to last year before it was found to be fake. After it hit the fan, I realized that my doubts were legitimate and should have taken them seriously and trusted my instincts.
Now, having identified a few red flags, it is incredibly important that you understand that I am NOT attempting to purposely bring suspicion to any blog that has not already been proven to be fake, nor do I believe that every blog that includes any or even all of these red flags is indeed fake. Furthermore, my list of red flags certainly is not an exhaustive list, and I have no doubt that there are many authentic blogs out there that might include some or all of the red flags I just mentioned. I know of several blogs that I believe are legit whose authors maintain a high level or privacy, use multiple authors, and offer the opportunity for people to donate and support financially...there are some very good reasons to do those things, but they tend to be the exception, not the rule. I'm certainly not an expert on this subject, and I did not sleep at a Holiday Inn last night...
Here are a few more thoughts that I've posted before about scamming blogs.
> Fake blogs and scammers have the potential to do great harm for those who are completely honest in sharing their stories of medical hardships and miracles. They mock people who are dealing with very real and serious health issues and bring an unfair level of doubt and scrutiny to honest bloggers. Because of scamming blogs, I have been told by a few people online that they have vowed to never again read mine or anyone else's blog simply because we talk the same topics as those of fake blogs.
> People react in a very hostile and knee-jerk way when they have been fooled by a fake blog. People who have been hurt begin going on witch hunts, accusations start flying all over the place, and blame is passed to any blogger who also innocently linked to the scammers. The only people to blame for these fake blogs are those who knowingly participated in the deception, which, it turns out, is usually just one or two people.
> Scams have the potential to do great harm to reputable organizations like CFF who raise funds and are making a huge difference in our world. Because fake blogs are often accused of raising moneys through fraud, many people are tempted to write off any future online fundraising opportunities as possible scams and accuse those who might be participating as fakes.
> Truth is truth, no matter the messenger. Whether concerning a health issue, discussions about faith, or posts about life in general, even the most twisted and deceitful person can still share very real and honest facts. Often, people are so quick and extreme to react to fake blogs that they throw the baby out with the bath water...they disregard everything the author wrote as one big fat lie, when, in fact, some of what was written is very true and very helpful.
Discovering a blog is fake is very frustrating, and really, nobody comes out looking good. People are seriously hurt, because blogging, by nature, is a very personal thing. The stories that scammers use are aimed at pulling at our heart strings and drawing us into an emotional attachment and involvement. It is frustrating beyond words to place your trust in somebody who asks for so much compassion, only to be made a fool.
While some become extremely jaded by a fake blog, most people understand that there is a healthy balance to be found between compassion and common sense. I'd personally rather be open and willing to show compassion at the risk of being called a fool than to be hard-hearted and cynical to anyone who appears to be in need of love. There is something good to be said about a world that can show such incredible love to perfect strangers.
Anyway, I'm probably preaching to the choir, and all of what I've just written may have been pointless. But, feel free to ad your healthy thoughts and comments, and I'd be more than happy to try and answer any general questions about fake blogs and online scams.
Nate
Having been personally duped by a fake blog about a year ago, and having observed (but thankfully not invested any energy, links, etc. into) the blog referred to above, I feel somewhat experienced in the art of spotting some potential red flags that might signal a scammer or a fake blog.
Here are a few fake blog red flags that I've identified:
> The blog author posts few to no pictures of him/herself and his/her life (like his/her family and friends, house, town/city, etc.). Both of the fake blogs I have experience never showed a single photo (face) of the author of the blog, and showed very few, if any, pictures of his/her life. There are some bloggers who like to protect their privacy, but by it's very nature, blogs are an incredibly public form of communication, and most people who get into blogging (for honest reasons) are very open about their lives...those bloggers who desire privacy usually set their blogs to "private" so that they are only viewable by a select few people. A blogger (especially one that has thousands of followers) who never posts a a picture of him/herself has always seemed a bit of an odd thing to me.
> The author uses an alias and/or refuses to post his/her real name or other personal info like hometown, names of hospitals, etc. Both of the fake blogs I have experience with had authors who either refused to post their real name, or often used an alias when posting. It's one thing to use nicknames for your wife or your kids or your friends, but it's another thing to not want people to know your real, full name. Again, blogging tends to attract people who don't mind some of their basic personal info being displayed to the world.
Personally speaking, we have been very open about our story, using pictures and much of our personal information. Our story has also been well documented in news papers and on television, and we have met countless blog readers in person who would be more than happy to vouch for our existence. Although we do atempt to protect our privacy to some degree, we have always welcomed a certain level of publicity for several reasons, not the least of which being to give ourselves some credibility should anyone (and some have tried) attack our integrity.
> There are multiple anonymous people authoring (posting) the blog. Both of the fake blogs I have experience with had multiple authors/posters. And, as it turned out, each of the scammers had also, to some extent, scammed the other author(s) of their own blog into believing their story and posting for them. Obviously the scammer realizes he/she is creating a web of lies, and it appears to me that, to use multiple authors gives the scammer a false sense of security and authenticity.
> The blog asks for money/donations of some kind that directly benefit the blogger. Without a doubt, money is one of the biggest reasons these fake bloggers get into it. Both of the scammers that I have experienced asked for personal donations or gifts.
On a personal note, before my blog became so popular, I had a link on my sidebar that asked for people to consider donating to Tricia's health care trust fund. Shortly after the blog exploded, however, I decided that it would be best for us not to use this blog to ask for personal financial support because 1) I determined that was not the purpose of this blog, 2) I knew it would turn some people off from reading our story, and 3) I didn't want our asking for personal financial support to come back and bite us in the butt. In fact, a year ago, when a popular CF related blog that I had linked to was found to be fake, several people (read trolls) began, very publicly, pointing fingers at me, accusing me of scamming people because I was also constantly asking for personal financial support...fortunately, several of my level headed blog readers also pointed out that had not been asking for any personal financial support for several months, and wisdom and truth prevailed.
> Something doesn't feel right. Bottom line, trust your instincts. If something feels off or if things just don't seem to add up, nobody is pressuring you to support or even read any blog. Again, we're each responsible for our own decisions, and even if thousands of others are hooked, you don't have to be.
I personally had some doubts about the legitimacy of the fake blog that I linked to last year before it was found to be fake. After it hit the fan, I realized that my doubts were legitimate and should have taken them seriously and trusted my instincts.
Now, having identified a few red flags, it is incredibly important that you understand that I am NOT attempting to purposely bring suspicion to any blog that has not already been proven to be fake, nor do I believe that every blog that includes any or even all of these red flags is indeed fake. Furthermore, my list of red flags certainly is not an exhaustive list, and I have no doubt that there are many authentic blogs out there that might include some or all of the red flags I just mentioned. I know of several blogs that I believe are legit whose authors maintain a high level or privacy, use multiple authors, and offer the opportunity for people to donate and support financially...there are some very good reasons to do those things, but they tend to be the exception, not the rule. I'm certainly not an expert on this subject, and I did not sleep at a Holiday Inn last night...
Here are a few more thoughts that I've posted before about scamming blogs.
> Fake blogs and scammers have the potential to do great harm for those who are completely honest in sharing their stories of medical hardships and miracles. They mock people who are dealing with very real and serious health issues and bring an unfair level of doubt and scrutiny to honest bloggers. Because of scamming blogs, I have been told by a few people online that they have vowed to never again read mine or anyone else's blog simply because we talk the same topics as those of fake blogs.
> People react in a very hostile and knee-jerk way when they have been fooled by a fake blog. People who have been hurt begin going on witch hunts, accusations start flying all over the place, and blame is passed to any blogger who also innocently linked to the scammers. The only people to blame for these fake blogs are those who knowingly participated in the deception, which, it turns out, is usually just one or two people.
> Scams have the potential to do great harm to reputable organizations like CFF who raise funds and are making a huge difference in our world. Because fake blogs are often accused of raising moneys through fraud, many people are tempted to write off any future online fundraising opportunities as possible scams and accuse those who might be participating as fakes.
> Truth is truth, no matter the messenger. Whether concerning a health issue, discussions about faith, or posts about life in general, even the most twisted and deceitful person can still share very real and honest facts. Often, people are so quick and extreme to react to fake blogs that they throw the baby out with the bath water...they disregard everything the author wrote as one big fat lie, when, in fact, some of what was written is very true and very helpful.
Discovering a blog is fake is very frustrating, and really, nobody comes out looking good. People are seriously hurt, because blogging, by nature, is a very personal thing. The stories that scammers use are aimed at pulling at our heart strings and drawing us into an emotional attachment and involvement. It is frustrating beyond words to place your trust in somebody who asks for so much compassion, only to be made a fool.
While some become extremely jaded by a fake blog, most people understand that there is a healthy balance to be found between compassion and common sense. I'd personally rather be open and willing to show compassion at the risk of being called a fool than to be hard-hearted and cynical to anyone who appears to be in need of love. There is something good to be said about a world that can show such incredible love to perfect strangers.
Anyway, I'm probably preaching to the choir, and all of what I've just written may have been pointless. But, feel free to ad your healthy thoughts and comments, and I'd be more than happy to try and answer any general questions about fake blogs and online scams.
Nate
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